HONOLULU (KHON2) — When caring for a loved one, it can sometimes feel like a job. But for one Mānoa mother and daughter, it doesnʻt feel like caregiving or a job.
“Itʻs just, you gotta pick the right strand,” said 92-year-old Lorna Tokunaga as she weaved hala into a soon-to-be basket.
Tokunaga started weaving as a child to help supplement her familyʻs income. Today she does it for joy.
“Just weave without even thinking, talk story.”
Ella, Lornaʻs daughter, is an artist who retired three years ago to become caregiver for her mother and father.
“It was really like a career change because it was difficulty in accepting the different responsibilities. But as we weave, itʻs no longer a mother-daughter relationship or caregiver and someone that I care for. Itʻs just we both weave and enjoy each otherʻs company. And kind of like, we weaving experiences together and those are the memories that I cherish,” said Ella.
The importance of shared experience is something that has been woven into the familyʻs story.
Ellaʻs father, Eddie Tokunaga, was one of the founders of the Shinnyo Lantern Floating Hawaii, now in its 25th year.
Ella said her father loved the ceremony for its shared moment of gratitude and healing.
“We all experience grief, happiness, joy, struggle. But when we all can come together and then share a moment of prayer and aloha for our lost ones, itʻs not a isolated moment. We share it with everyone and it becomes really special. Heʻs no longer with us so now heʻs on a lantern and then mom and I can share our prayers and love for him, just the way he intended it to be.”
The works of art that Lorna and Ella create are always given as gifts. To them, weaving itself is a gift providing treasured connections.
“Finding moments that we both enjoy that takes the caregiving away. It just becomes enjoyable shared moments.”